During my early and mid-teenage years whenever I heard stories or news of someone getting an abortion I thought to myself- “Why should an innocent soul pay the price of someone else’s mistakes?”, “How can a mother do that to her child?” It was during my late teenage years that I finally understood what was wrong with my mindset back then. I immediately associated women who got an abortion with ‘cruelty’ and ‘heartlessness’ without ever thinking they are Human beings with a life of their own- responsibilities, career, dreams and ambitions, feelings, family, problems, etc. I did not know them personally; I did not know their side of the story as to why they got an abortion but I was quick to judge them. I never perceived them as people living their life like others who had to make difficult choices in life like everybody else.

The thing is, women have always been at the receiving end of harsh criticism from society. Men might sleep around with multiple women (with or without the woman’s consent), get her pregnant and leave without taking accountability. But it will ultimately be women who are judged. It’s always: “Why did she have sex with him in the first place?”, “Did she not have the sense to use contraceptives?”, “Even if she got pregnant how can anyone kill their child?”, “There are plenty of single mothers who have been doing fine.” , “How can career be more important to her than her child?” But Never: “How can he leave her alone after getting her pregnant especially when she has such a huge life decision to make?” “How can he sexually assault someone and go on living a normal life as if nothing happened?”, “How

So, I took a moment to think. Am I feeling sorry for the fetus or is it my internalized misogyny? And sure enough, it was my internalized misogyny. The idea of criticizing and calling women for making decisions about their bodies did not settle well with me. Becoming a mother is a huge life decision that will change her life completely. Therefore, the choice of whether or not she wants to go through this change also depends on the woman entirely. It’s her who will have to go through the pregnancy, carry a child for 9 months, endure pain, sickness and give birth. Even in modern times, primary child care responsibility is usually taken by the mother. So it will be her who will have to give up on her sleep, give up on her dreams and ambitions, alter her lifestyle completely to raise the child. Then, what makes other people think they are entitled to decide on someone else’s body and life? Even if a woman gives birth crumbling under the pressure and judgment from society, it will be her who has to take full responsibility. The people judging and criticizing her won’t be there to help her out. So why should their opinions matter?

The eye-opening, light-bulb moment for me that turned me towards Pro-Choice was when I realized all of this anti-abortion movement was a result of Patriarchy; a way to keep women under control. Villainizing women who get an abortion while letting men be free from taking accountability was their way of turning women against women. And I refused to be a part of that propaganda. Now when I hear stories that someone got an abortion I think to myself- “Her body, her choice.”